emotional realization.

I woke up today,and everything just hit me hard in the face. I've been awake for less than ten minutes,and its already out of control. "im getting older" I thought,as I was laying in bed.. and I dont want to have black hair anymore..I tilted my head as I stared within the mirror..So i'll buy a wig,and i'll commit suicide before my next birthday. No, I cant..I'm not sure of what to do. I'm just scared to death of growing up.

People nowadays,I supose you could say are limited to this 'box' that prevents them from seeing and missing out on so fucking much. I'm not making assumptions and I'm certainly not living the high life myself,but I've come to recognize a lot of lifes features,and in time,begun to depend on this. I'm not meaning for every single person to live by the wild side and fuck the rules,for I'm merely encouraging you to explore every single door that becomes vacant. I think if we all had seriously open minds in everything we came across,we might appreciate the point of life and even understand ourselves more.


My opinion is that we aren't,or never have been misguided by the open ness of our minds,but lead astry by the narrow ment of it all. We aren't normal for sticking to something for the rest of our lives and we aren't deranged for expressing what others are too afraid to show.


Lets look at this from another angle..

Who the fuck wants to be tied down in a life thats here for experience? Me? Err,no thanks I'd rather eat shit..I can guarentee some of you are sitting back and opposing the points I've stated, thinking "I totally disagree" and there will be a hefty majority of you who have basically lived the life of a recluse,not physically but mentally, looking at your life as if its an iron cage,chained with metal you don't have a hope in hell of escaping whatsoever. Others though,might become aware of the fact that a box can quite easily be opened. Your not in some virtual fucking prison.People seem scared..just so fucking afraid of discovering more of life,which results in them looking back when they're older and thinking fuck,there was so much more to life that i didn't even uncover.didn't experience.taste,smell.devour.